damn is not a curse word

i think in some way I'm experiencing level 2 of culture shock,although i have considered myself well traveled and cultured I have never actually lived overseas alone and had to deal with so many things to think about and be cautious of and constant exclamations in the middle of the day,how do I even dial out? and my bliss has been a blissful streak of smiling and new friends and happy happy happy,I was disappointed to learn I am not a super person, I just got so tired today,and something scary happened and I came home and cried,then I stopped crying then cried some more because I was so disappointed in myself for actually forming tears when I am in such a wonder full place in life.

level 2 of culture shock by the way is when your past the "honeymoon" stage and reality hits you like that one dude that's drunk at a party and thinks yours someone else who is probably a bastard. and your standing there in this crowded room and its 3am and your tired,and your just there because who knows and your like man I just got hit and it feels nasty but lets dance some more....
(thank you Austin for being the man behind this analogy,thank you drunk random guy for changing)
yea,that's kinda what its like

dinner is always at 7
and food doesn't comfort me
it just reminds me of fuel
and fuel reminds me of
opposite lanes while driving.


it has been quite nice going from this:
to this