There is nothing I haven't felt
before this decade
that has compared to the heart ache
of something that was pushed
a feeling on speed
-restrained.

A heart attack takes
all the time he wants
he will creep
and he will wait.

Like a weed with a brain,
your roots reach China.
You are planted deep--
i begin..
to feel you in my spine,
and a little bit near my feet.

My eyelashes are crying now;
they do not seem to understand
time.

I spoke with Oswald yesterday.
--There is nothing wrong with obsessive tendencies
he said.
I always make sure to have a delicate string
wrapped loosely between my index finger and my left thumb
during our conversations.
Otherwise, I will bite all of Oswald's finger nails off.......
during our 55 minute conversations on nautical happenings
oh!
there is so much I've yet
to SEA.

If there is a nook I need it is the one closest to your-
face and and olden day things.

I found myself out...
and then I fell into a rhythm--
hypnotized with the beat
of your sweet sweet
being.

I wrote a song about you,twice.
It was about how you go  m-i-s-s-i-n-g 

i think the lyrics were:

When the sun shines you go away
When it rains there is solitude we seek
Solitude we selfish little energies
When the rain is over we surface
emerge from our nooks and our days
when the weeds take over
we pray
when the weeds grow tall you'll want me
when the weeds grow tall you'll remember to love me
oh but how I hate negative space
when it rains
negative. negative-space.


Remember when it took you forever to find out who you are in the first place?